plot twist: you wake up skinny, beautiful, intelligent and everyone loves you
hi hello if you’re reading this i hope something good happens to you today
westbor0baptistchurch: lolsofunny: westbor0baptistchurch: We all use to say “peasant”
oohtheyhavenibbles: bonesbuckleup: So today I learned that Eucalyptus leaves have this chemical in them and when koalas eat the leaves the chemical makes them drunk but since koalas only eat Eucalyptus leaves they basically go through their entire lives perpetually smashed.
volvata: when you had an appointment and got to leave during the middle of school it was always so fucking triumphant like “haha bye you dumb sons a bitches, i’m gonna go get my teeth cleaned and then eat mcdonalds. where you at”
overlordleaveshiswife: tltty: everyone in the world has an iphone except me i feel like a nun